Amazon.com Night Train to Terror is a horror anthology loosely tied together by interludes featuring God (Himself) and Satan (Lu Cifer) on a train haggling over the souls of characters in the stories. Along for the ride, for some reason, is what we're told is a "rock band," singing one rockin' little tune called, "Dance With Me," accompanied by some pretty hot breakdancing. The souls of the musicians are to be divied up also, but it's dramatically frustrating when this doesn't happen. The trio of stories presented make about as much sense as this, banking on absurd situations and splatter technique for their appeal, but coming off as unhumorously grisly and sadistic anyway. "The Case of Harry Billings" tells of a poor sod drugged up and hypnotized into luring unsuspecting victims to a hospital where their organs are forcibly harvested and sold to medical schools across the globe. Said harvesting takes place often without benefit of anaesthetic. Same goes for the viewer. "The Case of Gretta Connors" is a love story involving a death cult inventing ever more complex forms of Russian Roulette at which to cackle maniacally. And last, and certainly longest, is "The Case of Claire Hansen," pitting the devout Claire against the son of Satan, whose heart she must remove and place in a wooden box made from the actual Cross. While mostly tiresome and overlong, there are some amusing moments of the late-night variety, the kind you may mercifully not remember the next day. --Jim Gay
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